Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Still Hard to Believe...

The other day I was chatting with someone about class reunions, commenting on how it's hard to believe that I graduated from high school 28 years ago.... unbelievable! So much has happened between then and now, yet it doesn't feel like it's been that long. I truly don't feel that old.

During the day of calling hours, the fact that Austin was dead was still surreal. As I watched Austin's body lying in the casket, a thought kept popping in my head, "Wouldn't it be crazy if he suddenly sits up, says 'Boo! Just kidding...' and then laughs." Because that was Austin, always up for a good prank.

Only this time it wasn't a joke. And it's hard to believe that it's been almost 2 years since I said good-bye.

Today was one of those "Austin days," the kind of day I mentioned in an earlier blog (3/23/12... Just Like Yesterday). No matter what I was doing I kept thinking, "OK Austin, you can come back - anytime now. Jokes over...." Only I know it isn't a joke. He isn't coming back. Sometimes it doesn't feel like the calling hours and funeral were almost 2 years ago (22 months, 2 weeks to be exact). 22 months! Unbelievable.....

I wonder if this is how I will feel in 26 years, when Austin has been gone for 28 years. Will it seem like just yesterday? Will it still be hard to believe?